The secrets of a happy marriage together, as well as the secrets of longevity, are annually analyzed by psychologists and ordinary people. We will analyze 10 situations that will help a young family not make fatal mistakes in the first years of cohabitation.
10. Partner Secrets
When talking about family relationships, many immediately put a taboo on this topic, implying that this topic is prohibited. Whether your man wears panties with daisies or if your woman sleeps in a T-shirt with a kangaroo, no one should know about this. Information that is reproduced between partners should remain only in this vicious circle. No matter how great the desire to brag about the merits of your spouse or wife, you should not do this without the permission of your loved one. Confidence in marriage is a very fragile thing, therefore it is always necessary to treat it with extreme caution. A word, it’s like a sparrow - remember!
9. Shopping plans
Yes, it may seem funny to someone, but the desire to tell the whole world that the family will soon get a cool car is quite common. Add to this the envy of colleagues on the part of the husband and the envy of friends on the part of the wife and get an explosive mixture of human hatred. It is clear that buying a car will not be easy to hide, you still do not buy diamonds, but try to answer friends' questions without emotion. It will be enough to say that you saved for a long time on the car, and you had to take part of the money on credit. Shopping plans should be discussed by spouses only at the family table and make sure that the door to the balcony is closed.
8. Family income
The man is so arranged that he is “happy,” the friend’s failure, and his luck makes him very angry. From this a very simple conclusion follows that the certificate of 2-personal income tax of the spouse should be contemplated only by them and the accountant who issues them. Especially often, the income of the family is very interested in the parents of the wife and husband, who are willingly giving advice on how to increase this income. If the conversation turned to this topic, and the financial side is not so strong, but stable, immediately transfer the conversation to another topic, if it does not work out, then boldly say that digging into someone else's wallet is not nice. Well, what can my best friend say about how much her husband earns? Only two golden words of a wise wife - we have enough!
7. Health Issues
This is a very personal situation and only those who are interested in their recovery or have given the right to communicate with strangers on this topic have the right to talk about it. Even the most morally stable people get lost and annoyed when asked about the disease. The family itself must decide between the members of its "nest" the question of whether external assistance is required or whether they will cope with this problem themselves, I do not devote people around them. Even if a husband or wife acts with good intentions, this can lead to serious conflict and there are a lot of examples in the statistics of psychologists.
6. Dispute details
It is rather a struggle of vanity between spouses, because I really want to brag to other people that one was smarter than the other. But, there is a psychological barrier that many do not see, namely, loyalty. Only a wife who knows how he needs it, that is, to be the first, can give in to her husband. Accordingly, and vice versa. In couples, there are often two leaders, one explicit, the other secret and this is an ideal couple. Another case is when there are two clear leaders who are trying by all means to compete with their partner, even if the argument was about simple things. The conclusion for couples here is obvious, medals in the family are not handed out!
5. Disadvantages of a partner
This situation is only worthy of the goods. Only about a product can a person speak out after he has acquired it, but not about his beloved person with whom he has linked his life for many years. Before the “suite nest”, the couple looks closely at each other, evaluating, analyzing and making a conclusion. Marriage is a conclusion, humility or acceptance, but not patience. Tolerate the shortcomings of a partner and even more so to tell outsiders about them, humiliates a person who not only spoke about them, but also those endowed with them. If the marriage certificate has a common surname, then this indicates that if a person has flaws, one hundred you accepted and reconciled, and therefore, your soulmate is the best.
4. Opinion about friends and relatives
This applies, of course, to the category of gossip, but it cannot do without it. In this situation, only internal education and endurance will help. Do not forget that the friends and relatives of one, completely alien people for the other, and he did not choose them. If your spouse’s aunt behaves rudely, to put it mildly, you don’t need to blame your aunt’s bad shoulders for not taking your aunt up to date, you have the opportunity to talk face-to-face with her. If the family has an ambiguous relationship with relatives, then a compromise must be found through the fact that communication will be minimized. Spouses must substantiate their position with each other. But, if the opinion can be kept with you, it is better to keep it there.
3. Intimate photos
Nowadays, photographs are no longer a luxury and to see yourself captured in an unexpected place is not a problem. Another thing is when a married couple, enjoying society, takes photos of each other for memory, for personal viewing and family history. It would not be right to call such photos family, they are more of a private nature, only for two. Even if the spouse has “cubes” in the press, which he hides from strangers and can only be seen in the intimate photo, this is not a reason to secretly show off such photos to friends. Extra jealousy of friends and attentive attitude to spouse, there is nothing.
2. Financial problems
This is most likely the most painful and aching “wound” of the male sex. It just so happened that men bring a mammoth and thereby feed and warm their family. If this does not happen, that is, the hunt is unsuccessful or the mammoths have gone to a different dimension, then husbands will have a crisis and a decrease in self-esteem. They begin to feel unnecessary, not wealthy and not held. However, only his wife should see and encourage such a husband. For others, the husband simply went on vacation. Financial problems are always only temporary, but the spouse’s resentment will be eternal if he finds out that you are complaining to a neighbor that there is no money in the family and that the husband is lying on the couch. The main rule of a real family is that one will always support the other, and will not try to drown him in his grief.
1. Sexual preferences
The topic is very personal and scrupulous, since only they should know about the preferences of the spouses. For most people, shopping in stores with intimate symbols is considered not a decent occupation. If you enter a happy minority and often pamper your family bedroom with something like this, then try to do this with the utmost care. Feel free to tell the curious that they stick their nose out of business. Keep all questions about bedding in the bud, this topic is closed to outsiders, even if the husband is a mustang in bed, and the wife owns acrobatics that others have never dreamed of.